Monday, September 2, 2019

Eric Vs. 365 - Day 64 - Sonic Generations

When Sonic Generations is at its best, it is exactly what I want from a Sonic game. It looks amazing and lets you run stupidly fast. That's all I want from Sonic, and Sonic Generations does a good job of it. Unfortunately, it only lets you do that, maybe, 10% of the time and the rest of the time is doing slow boring platforming and flying off platforms because you didn't notice QTEs popping up. Why you gotta be so crap, Sonic? Read more right here.

I want to make something clear: I actually freaking honestly truly 100% hate Sonic the Hedgehog. A lot of YouTubers and Internet personalities "hate" Sonic as a joke and aren't really serious. It's all a gag for them to rile up the fan base and slide into a hyperbolic character that pretends to hate Sonic. I really genuinely hate these games. It isn't an act. 

So why do I keep playing them? Because I want to try to understand what other people see in them. I want to know how people enjoy these games at all. I want to figure out how these characters have turned normal folks into the weirdest fan base in all of gaming. After playing a dozen Sonic games across multiple platforms and re-releases, I still don't get it.

The most joyous parts of Sonic games are when you're running fast through levels, doing loops, doing corkscrews, jumping off a ramp and flying through the air, and never having to slow down for anything. This isn't actually what Sonic games are about, though. Sonic games are actually slow and methodical platformers where you pick your way through precise jumps and maze-like levels. What Sonic "is" and what I "want" it to be are two totally different things. I acknowledge that. I get it that fans understand that about Sonic and appreciate the games for that. That doesn't mean I have to just bend over and like it.

And it doesn't mean the games wouldn't be 100% better if they were more like what I want. Imagine a Sonic game that was all running fast and no stopping to do boring platforming. No enemies. No spikes. No death pits. Just running fast. The levels would have multiple paths where slight changes in speed would launch you off jumps at different angles and you'd end up on a new route. The routes could criss cross back and forth and it would almost be like a puzzle where selecting the right combination of path changes would result in faster times. That would be freaking addictive and amazing and fun. 

Sonic Generations also has 3D levels that freaking suck. I don't know how to fix 3D Sonic at all. The end.